Punch goes communist

KROKODIL, Russia's satirical paper, published its version of a British journalist the other day. The man was sitting up dog-like, with a pen instead of a bone in his mouth, in front of his "capitalist bosses".

These extracts from the new navel by loathsome deviationist 1972 Nobel Prizewinner ALAN COREN are published solely in the hope that our British Soviet citizens may learn the true meaning of decadence. 1t is of interest that the lying neo-fascist hyena has since been certified

MAHOOD looks at how our civil servants would cope with a Red Revolution in Britain

Still the most popular show on television ! And tonight forty million British comrades will tune in for the terror and excitement and, in 39,999,999 cases, the relief of seeing Comrade Andrews tear off the wrapper and face one more cowering victim with

One of Britain's few surviving gentlemen buttonholes

Haywards Heath Man's Amazing Story

Sir William Barnetson reports on a year of internal consolidation